In Between the Clouds and Sea

So last night I was thinking

2009-12-26T17:56:00.004-06:00

about all of my friends that are getting married/starting families. I was also thinking about how I don't feel like I am ready to get married yet, or have babies, or any of that. The more I thought about it, the more I realized that it isn't that I am not ready or not capable of doing these things and doing them well, it's just that I feel like I have so much more living to do before I reach that point.

I want to travel, see the world, and photograph it some more. I want to meet people that challenge me, shape me, break me, and help get me put back together. I want to read until my eyeballs shrivel up and fall out of my head, only for me to dust them off and put them back in again so I can read some more. I want to learn so much it makes my head spin. I want to get so completely lost I think I'll never find my way and then blaze a trail to where I need to be. I want to feel alive, vibrant and, more than anything else, happy.

I wish the best for my friends starting new lives with significant others, and I can't wait 'til I get there, but right now I'm in no hurry.

Merry Christmas to all!

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And to all a good night!

Holy cow

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my jaw is in pain.

That being said:

Tomorrow

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my wisdom teeth get yanked. Bring on the pain.

If you want more love

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why don't you say so?

Back then I swore

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I was gonna marry him someday, but I realized bigger dreams of mine.

When all you wanted was to be wanted

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Wish you could go back and tell yourself what you know now.

Much of the storm has passed

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and I made it.

"You are what you love, not what loves you. That's what I decided a long time ago."--Adaptation.

Epic fail, self.

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I just tried to post my schedule from now til the end of the semester and failed because there is too much going on. Wah wah.

Save me.

Two things:

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Wonderful:

Wonderful-er:

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Gobble. Gobble. Gobble.

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Love this so much.

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Pimp my...golfcart?

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Yikes.

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Shameless plug...

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If you wanna buy a magazine subscription...please do so! :)

First 5K and I feel great!

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I ran my first ever 5K and it went swimmingly! It was kind of cold and it drizzled at bit before the race, but I love running when its cold out. Sure, I didn't finish first. Sure I only finished with five people after me. Sure, the first place finisher ran it three times. Sure, my fingers are a little bit swollen. BUT! I didn't finish last! I ran almost the entire time! I finished in about thirty minutes, which I think is good for my first ever 5K! My lungs didn't have any trouble and in fact were not gasping for breath! My mental stamina isn't awesome, so that's something to work on! There's nowhere to go but up! This totally made my day. :)

Time it was and what a time it was

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it was. A time of innocence, a time of confidences. Long ago it must be, I have a photograph. Preserve your memories, they're all that's left of you.

One year ago today

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I was typing this and this about my trip to Germany. I can't believe that it was a year ago already! Now when I look back at that psychotic trip to Germany with Joanie, Suzanne, and Sarah I can't stop laughing, get nostalgic, and Europe-sick at the same time. Who knew that when I was miserable and sleeping on the floor of the Salzberg train station that a year from then I would look back and smile. I love hindsight.

In other news: I WILL FINISH MY FULBRIGHT APPLICATION TODAY! I WILL! I WILL!

...I am wearing my Universidad de Granada hoodie for inspiration. And if that's not enough inspiration, this might work:

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"life is so ridiculously gorgeous, strange, heartbreaking, horrific, etc., that we are compelled to describe it to ourselves, but we can't! we cannot do it! and so we make art."
(via Taylor Self)

I am in one of those moods

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where I am super happy, yet feel like crying all at once.

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Happy Birthday F. Scott Fitzgerald!

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If you gaze for long into the abyss, the abyss gazes also into you. (via Julia Eicher)

Well I was correct about my last post

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but I am going to continue to write anyway.

I chose my editors today, and I am very excited! I just hope the other 11 don't stop participating in Broadside because I didn't pick them.

Le sigh.

I have also decided

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after publishing that last post, that no one reads this at all. Oh well.